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He was loving, talented, intelligent, witty . . . we miss him. Musings of August 6th, 1996 - Jack Bice Following this collection of notes, the reader will find a preface, written "after the fact" and longer than the original writing. It seemed necessary to explain to myself certain underlying concepts behind my thinking which have been spinning within my Consciousness for many years. Although I find myself capitalizing certain words, such as "Consciousness", which represent Imponderables or hold special significance, the following thoughts are not an attempt to build a personal theology. They are humble musings, not meant to define final answers to Profound Questions, but merely to reflect upon some aspects of Life and the Universe which I find "verifiable" by observation from my own, modest station within the Exquisite Paradox. I am merely attempting to give to myself a glimpse of a deeper "reality" through contemplation . . . to explain a few things privately to myself. And, for anyone who may be perusing these esoteric thoughts, I hope they might prove interesting to you, too.
The following "real substance" was jotted down in about fifteen minutes at the cabin after I had awakened with ill-defined, dream-thoughts of Warrlck and the mysteries of Life, Death and Cosmic Functions. Subsequently, I had shown it to Avery and Doris, and it apparently elicited some discussion. Avery called just as we were about to leave for Tesuque, requesting a copy. * * * An invented term, "The Omnience": "The overall cosmic phenomenon which patterns itself and evolves through time." The Mysterious Sequence: We can observe, briefly stated, that energy and sub-units of matter assemble progressively into more and more complex, discrete, patterned entities; that these eventually become self-sustaining, reproductive: they are then "life", "alive". to everything external. Finally - beyond instinct - it is intellectually analytical, not only of everything else, but of itself: "Self', and introspection are born. Each autonomous, evolved Being then has not only its own, unique physical body, but also its own mind. Whether this sophisticated, acute awareness actually represents Life's ultimate potential, we perhaps cannot know. But, humans seem to experience this state of consciousness - as they conceptualize ideas, feel emotions, look within themselves and others - as the pinnacle of their independent development. A thought: Are not obviously the autonomous separate islands of Life and awareness which have thus formed from the primordial Universe all fragmented parts of the Whole, of the Omnience, which has parceled itself into Us? We seem all to be parallel, multi-universes of consciousness, each of which must forever observe and respond to the others - and each from its own perspective! And, other thoughts: Perhaps we are therefore merely reflective, expressive mechanisms for the Omnience, serving its functioning. Is this the way the Whole "expresses" Itself - through fragmented, divergent units arguing and harmonizing among themselves? Are we, in our isolation, functioning bits of a more sublime, whole Omnience? Does It seek eccentric expression through our consciousness while at the same time tending, itself, to evolve toward an ultimate Unity, just as water, roiled by the winds into endless waves, some aggressive, others harmonious, finally calmed by gravity to seek its own level? And, touching upon thoughts of Morality: In our often desperate struggles to survive a Life stirred by ill-winds, are we forced to be divisive, "immoral"? Or - a more positive thought - in lucid, non-threatened moments of calm, are we, as fragmented units, inclined to recombine, to Unify, to integrate back into the whole? Blending, sharing, empathizing with each other - with our "Self'? This latter thought would seem to hint that for mere, mortal Life there is a more sublime, integrated domain - the Omnience, itself. But is the Omnience a haven which Life seemingly, spiraling out of Time and back onto itself, offers us no mechanism to access? So, the Ultimate Question which humans seem compelled to ask: In Death, does our life force and energy of consciousness reintegrate, while our physical elements disperse? And, after all of this thought, what of our individual, lonely journeys, illuminated only by our vague insight into the Universe, into ourselves and others? Will I "see", or know or experience Warrlck again? I think that, as an expressive unit of the Omnience, he - his organization - his organism - has passed in Time. Was I experiencing a view of the Omnience through him? I would like to think so, but have only conjectures, only such musings as these, to support the thought. Is he - It - still there, just not as tangible, experiencable form? Are he, and I, and all of us, simply but profoundly The Omnience? Are we merely subdivided and isolated from Its-our-Self by some quirk of the Grand Mathematics? I think with deep pathos that that aspect of the Omnience which was Warrlck is no longer organized for my convenient interchange. And, although these musings have only touched upon the nature of Time in the Grand Design, I believe that, although I may re-experience him in poignant memory, Warrick is not "Now" - yet perhaps, as he said in his poem, he is, "Here, and always here." Was he, like all of us, destined to be re-integrated back into the greater unity, into the Whole which surrounds us and from whence we came? * * * " . . . Just Is What Is, and why it is: What Was supplied the tool. From this sprung life; sprung me, from dawn to dusk to be: To roam among What Is for now, and fields of tomorrow sow, and have my part in eternity, Forever affecting What Will Be. And where I'll go, someday I'll know. I'll stop en route and view the show, For time will take me there to see what came to pass; what was to be. And looking back I'll say to me: 'This was to be my destiny'. But I'll not linger there. I will but briefly stare at all that's done, and all that's gone, and I'll not even care. For I'll be here, and always here, and never, never there..." from a poem. "Is What Is", by Warrick Bice. 1988 * * * Preface Thoughts about "The Omnience" (my own invented term) spring from contemplation of two prescient, prevalent, contemporary, scientific-philosophical assumptions - and from two "unsolved mysteries". The assumptions: first, that the Physical Universe which we observe is Self-formulating; and, second, that Time is cyclical. And the mysteries? The mysteries are Life and Consciousness, two "observable" phenomena - occurrences which we witness through our very existence, but for which, to my knowledge, science and philosophy have no explanations. * * * Theology As hinted above, I believe in science and philosophy as mankind's best windows into the Unknowable. I am moved by humankind's collective abilities to experience, to reflect and analyze; to feel emotions but to look carefully, to rationalize with logic. And I, as perhaps only a pawn in the vast game, am in awe of the Great Enigma. Why? Perhaps because, from a contemporary, scientific perspective, one easily can imagine in the Universe other, more developed and attuned life-forms than humans. Beings which well might operate beyond our naïve perceptive and intellectual powers. What personifications would their "Gods" take? * * * The Self-formulating Physical Universe and Time A Theory: All matter and energy which now exists in the galaxies - the stars, the planets, and indeed in all living things - originated in a "Big Bang". Yet, this was perhaps only one of an infinitely cyclical series of colossal, cosmic explosions and collapses. Thus, much lies beyond comprehension: Mysteries. Paradoxes. Example: Beyond what our minds and senses can see and study empirically, one Profound Aspect not observable and therefore beyond our ken is both the great system's Origin and its Destiny. Are these two opposites One and the Same, like an infinite, Moblus Loop? Is Time, Itself, a loop? Evolution of the Universe The energies and matter of the Universe seem to have arranged themselves from utter Chaos into ever more sophisticated forms. Hypothesis: Following the most recent Big Bang, sub-particles and primal matter proliferated and became diversified, forming simple elements. Then, responding to laws of attraction and repulsion in random encounters, the elements combined, becoming more complex compounds and mixtures - evolving from Hydrogen and the simple elements, to carbon compounds of prodigious complexity and potential; finally, even to living matter. That stupendous phenomenon seems observable and definable by logic. Yet, the very existence of the Whole is a grand puzzle: An Evolving Order which appears to form and pattern itself from a Chaos which springs from Nothing (or from an infinitely compressed Everything?)! Thus, we not only can conjecture about interesting, evolving stages of "our" Universe following "our" Event, but we also can toy with perplexing propositions such as that Time, Infinity, Mathematics, Language and Semantics all might be somehow interrelated. And is it all through the Consciousness? * * * Life And what paradox is readily observable about the mystery of Life, itself? Simply, life seems manifest only in composites of certain "organically' patterned elements. Life forms appear as arrangements - profoundly intricate patternings - of billions of minute components, all interdependent, all "organized into an organism". Yet, amazingly, as the organism lives, its basic elements are constantly being replaced - interchanged with the environment. A never-ending game of Musical Chairs! And finally, if the design - the order - the organization - is disrupted, the organism becomes dysfunctional. Indeed, if it disintegrates beyond a limited point, its life ceases, its parts joining inanimately with the Whole: "Dust to Dust". We call this "un-integrated" state Death. So, what is death? Merely a dissipation? For, the elements, themselves do not cease to exist; only the pattern does. A Semantic Paradox: Is a bag of beans (a living body) the same bag of beans after its beans have been emptied and replaced? Question: In an organism, do the elements, themselves, "contain" the life? Or, hypothesis: Is Life a more mysterious, marvelous manifestation of a perfectly evolved Pattern? of a Design, albeit of shifting matter? Is manifest Life, while of diverse substances, really a function not of the elements themselves but of an indescribable "Geometry"? Is Life a function of the Formal Arrangement - of an Exquisite Combination? If so, a new hypothesis: Might, therefore, some indecipherable, powerful Magic of Mathematics be a higher, more commanding order of the Universe than mere physical matter and energy which are seemingly subservient to it? Have we just imagined an ultimately refined, calculating and commanding force; perhaps an original force of "Mathematics", an order and energy, which lies behind the Universe? And, might this be somehow related to "Mind Power"? (Are paradoxes merely semantics?) The Mind Through this wild fight, we are led to something else magnificent - the Mind, that intangible "thinking" and "feeling" consciousness emanating within the Brain (The Brain, in turn is that special, unique, physical, computing part of a living organism which seems to generate mind functions). A Theory: Patterned functionings in the more mechanical aspects of living organisms seem constrained, preordained by code: An arm grows as an arm; a heart as a heart; etc. But - assuming an organizing, dynamic mathematics lies behind all viability, including the mental - are these forces more liberally functional in the developed mind, such as a human's, than in the physical domain? There, in the mind, within billions of synapses, are the mathematics of the Universe more free to interrelate, to re-pattern, to restructure . . . to generate "thinking", "memory","intuition"? Is this "consciousness"? * * * Consciousness Philosophically, it all is expressed In Descartes' famous dictum, "I think, therefore I am." So, Consciousness is equally as self-evident, yet mystifying, as the Physical Universe, as Time, and as Life. Consciousness seems to "inhabit" living matter. We witness consciousness from the most primitive response of one-celled creatures to stimuli, to the most erudite self-awareness, the "self-consciousness" of the calculating, thinking and pondering humans with their whirring synapses and egos. This final phenomenon is, for myself, equally as majestic and mysterious as the others. And, seen together, all of these grand observations inspire more challenging thoughts and speculative answers: What compelling energies, beyond the physical, permeate the Universe? Do they manifest and express themselves as Mind patternings in Syntax and Semantics; or simply as organic patternings? Can we ever "know" the complete "nature" of Nature? Obvious Answer: Probably never - unless to Experience means to Know. Speculation: Perhaps it is through Living that we actually experience - become - "Creation", The Whole, The Omnience!: another Mobius Loop. * * * Such fundamental questions! Yet they spring from such primitive observations: from sights and sensations which confront us from our first moments as babes when we open our eyes with awed consciousness upon the world; when we can somewhat observe, be puzzled by, and think about what we witness. For myself such thoughts are rich in hints and dreams for contemplation. Awe-inspiring: I see that my opportunities are to experience) and to explore (even when the trials are painful); that my role is to function as deeply, as effectively and benevolently in Life as my Individual potential allows. I am both content and thankful to be a Part, how-so-ever I am to be resolved, in the Grand Scheme. - jack bice jack bice Quick Tour more writings |
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